Hauling is the lifeblood of EVE. Without it and industry, no supers can die, no titans can be tackled, and EVE would be boring. Hauling makes our little cluster of stars, space mad players, and scheming CEOs go round.
This particular ALOD is dedicated to all those space truckers who do it right, who deliver their cargo on time and without incident. The people in these ALODs did not do that. So laugh at these people. Laugh good and hard, and learn from them. Just don’t be like them.
Our first example comes from Jita, where a Nereus’s fate was sealed by the volley of a Tornado. Normally this would not be noteworthy, except that with lows full of Inertia Stabilizer II’s and empty midslots it was not boasting much in the way of tank. Zerg Ceaille was clearly trying to decrease his align time, which shows he was probably concerned about gankers. But rather than fit any sort of tank he tried to make his industrial insta-aligning, something utterly impossible. Then he exploded and somebody took his stuff. The saddest thing is that with a cargo of less than 1700m3 he could have fit a Damage Control, filled every lowslot with reinforced bulkheads, rigged for max structure, easily had the EHP to soak up two Tornado volleys, and still have at least 100m3 of empty cargo space.
The next loss is a fine example of “screw reason, smoke meth, hail Satan.” Dr HalesK decided to take a glorious wonder of Amarr engineering worth two billion ISK and turn it into an ass backwards industrial from the depths of Battleclinic hell.
Marauder class battleships are tough nuts to crack, and reasonably so given their price. When in bastion mode they get massive reps, much like a carrier in triage. Killing one normally takes absurd amounts of firepower or a long, long time. They are also very hard hitting and immune to jamming so anything trying to take one down must itself avoid destruction for however long the fight takes. Of course all that only applies if they have a tank fit.
Dr HalesK was in New Caldari when he was targeted by a wardec corp. Perhaps he was ignorant of the wardec, or maybe he thought he could slip past it. We may never know. What we do know is that every lowslot on the Paladin was full of cargo expanders with the tank fitting in cargo. Despite careful scrutiny by the greatest minds that TMC had to offer the reason for this at first escaped us. However, after consulting with a number of spaceship biologists it was determined that this Paladin was pregnant with a Retribution assault frigate and had grown accordingly.
This Marauder was laid low by the combined fire of a Machariel, a Cynabal, and a Stiletto. The Cynabal didn’t even have Tech II guns on it. With the two large armor reps, the thermic armor hardener, and the EANM fit this Paladin should have been able to more or less perma-tank 1500 damage per second, burst rep over 2500, and dish out close to a thousand DPS. This kill is so fractally wrong it made the editorial staff want to drink, and it isn’t even 2 o’clock.
At the time of this writing we could not contact either parties who participated in these ALODs.
This article originally appeared on TheMittani.com, written by Vos.
