Rampage Inc’s DC 2022 Shareholder Meeting


Header Art by Cryo Huren

Last fall, the Rampage Inc stream hatched a sinister plot. They planned to unleash a small squad of goons on the US capital. Their mission? Drink as much Big Wave as humanly possible.

The early planning estimated for less than 50 members to go on this elite suicide mission. Leaked planning (if you could call streaming the entire plan on a twitch stream a leak) caused the event to be goonrushed to oblivion.

Key Metrics

Throughout the course of the event I tried to gather metrics as best I could to measure the success or failure of our mission. This proved quite difficult as the event went on and the oceans of Big Wave ebbed and flowed. However, I was able to find a number of interesting facts.

  • 145 people were scheduled to attend. 90 people attended.
  • The Bigwave tab for the KF birthday bash on Thursday was $2,800.
  • Thursday at the Yard House, the Big Wave ran out.
  • Thursday and Friday pregaming at the hotel bar resulted in them running out of Big Wave.
  • At the Friday dinner, the team went through 7 cases of Big Wave in about 2.5 hours.
  • According to the hotel bar manager, the total damage in beer and food (JUST THERE) was somewhere between $8,000 and $12,000.

Date: Thursday 13 Jan, 2022

T minus one day and the early scouts started to arrive and roll into the fray. The team conducted reconnaissance of the blocks in and around the staging hotel. Myself, MrsFroggy, The Wurst, and King Arthur split into two teams in search of secondary sources of intoxication and sustenance. Meeting back at the hotel for an early dinner (I blame jetlag and not being old).

Date: Friday 14 Jan, 2022, Morning

Intrepid goons continued to descend on the hotel through the night and into the morning. A growing contingent of operatives remained at the hotel to deal with the $20 endless mimosa brunch. I, however, took out a small gang looking for something different. About 20 goons moved down a few blocks for Sushi and Sake. This team included several VIPs, including the famous fainting goat.

Date: Friday 14 Jan, 2022, Evening

As the time neared for the KarmaFleet Birthday event, groups of goons began to migrate to the Yard House in DC’s Chinatown area. They had been warned of our mission, and reportedly stocked Big Wave.

I say reportedly because they greatly underestimated our appetite.

First Big Waves for Brisc and Merk

Following this auspicious start, sliders and beers began to flow freely. Brisc interrupted the consumption with a few words of recognition for Karmafleet in general and Merkelchen in particular. Merk was presented with a glass award to commemorate the event.

Photo Credit: Issabella
Photo Credit: MrsBrisc

Date: Friday 14 Jan, 2022, After Hours

By 9PM, the Yard House was ready to admit defeat. The crew moved back to the hotel briefly to regroup. From there, MrsBrisc set us onto a new course. First we were headed to the pub Sign of the Whale. Unfortunately, they were closed for a private event. There was a brief discussion between the Camelot Showbar, and the Ozio cigar lounge a few doors down.

The goons annexed most of this wing of the building.

The Ozio won out and I have to say it was kind of a strange experience. Being someone old enough to remember a time when one could actually smoke in bars, and being back in a bar that is free for smoking… Well, it was a strange mix of nostalgia and dry mouth. Don’t tell my primary care physician, but I broke my decade long cigar hiatus and enjoyed one.

Not a great deal of evidence from this bar managed to get posted. I enjoyed it, but was much too intoxicated to keep up on the journalism aspect. Folks drifted off slowly over the course of the next hours. Myself and MrsFroggy abandoned the fight around midnight and there were 20 to 30 people still there. No Big Wave to report, but large quantities of domestic bottled beer consumption.

Date: Saturday 15 Jan, 2022, Midday

I don’t know if “most” were slow to awaken. But I sure was. I blame the cigar however and not the drinking. After getting mobile and getting some food on board, the day didn’t seem quite so grim to face. After that, She and I did the tourist thing, as many others had, touring the monuments and museums of the mall.

Photo Credit: Major Sniper

Date: Saturday 15 Jan, 2022, Evening

After I and others had wrapped up our sightseeing, we reconvened at the hotel bar, only to run into the first real snag of the event. The bar’s Big Wave kegs were empty and the bottles had run dry. A warning of things to come.

The goons were herded into the business center for the grand dinner. There were several key events to note. First, the leadership of GSOL changed hands with a “formal” resignation letter and a handoff of the Zulu clock.

Photo Credit: Doozer (aka MrsKlavas)
Photo Credit: MrsBrisc

Second, four 3d printed rifter USB hubs were distributed. The distribution was random, “Oprah style”. Boxes were put under random chairs throughout the room. I’m not saying its rigged, but I ended up with one. However, other unplanned gifts were also found. More on that to follow.

Third was the CCP swag to all of the attendees. Skins, Shot glasses, and pins, all in a lovely collectors fanny-pack. Several space-famous people also noted that these packs made excellent beer cadies for the goon on the go.

Photo Credit: MrsFroggy
Photo Credit: MrsBrisc

Finally, someone had an avatar 3D-printed, and the most daring of goons were taking “doomsdays to the face” from it as depicted here.

Photo Credit: MrsBrisc

Time for Gossip

Now I have all the main parts of the story out of the way, I can start on the more salacious moments of the event. I will start with my own Mrs flaunting the law and making a mockery of the smoking laws. Sigh. As a professional rule follower, I am mortified.

Next, we had an attempted AWOX event during the meetup. In addition to the approved door prizes, a magnetic dart was located under one of the chairs by one Dawn Rhea. A rogue member of the Initiative used this weapon to assault an unsuspecting Brisc during the night.

Photo Credit: Cassceard

And then, Dawn Rhea stole a titan. After she took her doomsday, Dawn Rea took the Avatar back to her room for #reasons. The titan showed up back in its owners hangar the next morning. As far as I know, we are not asking any further questions, for fear of the answers.

Wrapping Up

Everyone who attended seemed to have a great time. I have been to several Eve Vegas events and this was much more fun in my opinion. Were it not for MrsKlavas making MrsFroggy promise to attend Vegas, I would swear off Vegas entirely for events like this one.

Thank you very much to the planning committee members from the Rampage INC stream, and a big thank you to everyone who attended. You all made this a success. You being willing to take the time, travel, and face the plague to join your space-friends in the real world. I thank you for making this vacation one of the best of my life.

The Planning Committee (Innominate couldn’t attend)

Lastly, I want to do a special shoutout to those who couldn’t attend. Some of you had flights cancelled. Some of you were sick. All of you were sincerely missed, and I can’t wait to see you all at the next event.

Photo Credit: MrsFroggy

Let your voice be heard! Submit your own article to Imperium News here!

Would you like to join the Imperium News staff? Find out how!